[00:00:00] April Babcock: Guess what? A Xanax never killed anyone and a Percocet never killed anyone. They do now because they're fake. And a these young kids, they just don't know.​

 (MUSIC UP!) 

[00:00:17] Angela Kennecke: Can you hear the fire in her voice? April Babcock is on a mission to tackle our nation's drug crisis with a sharp focus on the alarming prevalence of fentanyl. So passionate is her drive that each year she organizes a march on the capitol in dc determined to grab the attention of lawmakers and demand. Immediate action. Take a listen to last year's rally..

(sound from Facebook video I sent-:35 seconds in “Right to the White House–here we come President Biden. We want that border secure. We need something to happen immediately.”)

[00:00:58] April Babcock: They got to do something different. They can't treat it like they were treating the crisis 10 years years ago because it's not the same. You got instant death in the drug supply. They have to do something different. Or we're gonna get bodies on bodies. On bodies. bodies.

[00:01:16] Angela Kennecke: In this episode of Grieving Out Loud, hear Why Babcock is so fired up about fentanyl. This is an episode you won't wanna miss as it exposes the harsh truths and highlights the pressing need for a fresh approach. Get ready to be inspired and empowered to make a difference.

 (MUSIC UP!) 

[00:01:40] Angela Kennecke: April, welcome to Grieving Out Loud. I am so sorry that we're meeting under the circumstances of us both having lost a child to Fentanyl, but I'm very grateful for all the work that you are doing to try to put an end to this horrible epidemic.

[00:01:54] April Babcock: Thank you for having me on your show, Angela.

[00:01:57] Angela Kennecke: Let's talk about Austen, your son, your 25 year old son. Can you tell me what happened with Austen?

[00:02:04] April Babcock: I almost avoid talking about it about him. It's really hard for me. But um, he started playing soccer in kindergarten. And he played all sports in elementary school, but his favorite, I mean, that boy like lived for soccer. He played it all year round. He He star goalie when he was a freshman, they actually put him up in varsity. because that good as a freshman. Like he was good. He was very talented.

So his senior year of high school, he was off of the soccer for more than one failing grade, which I think is a complete nightmare. It wasn't like was messing around. He just struggled his whole life. You know, he had a learning disability His ninth grade year, he was on a third grade he was in ninth grade.

But to make a long story short, his senior year, he kicked off the soccer team and that's when it all started. So he was severely depressed. Started hanging out with an entirely new group of people and started out with marijuana. People think marijuana isn't a gateway and they just legalized here in maryland.

It is a gateway. gateway he Started off with marijuana at the the age of 19, 19

[00:03:19] Angela Kennecke: same with my daughter, Start off with marijuana about 15. And marijuana is not for kids. It's not for the developing brain. And quite frankly, every person I've talked to who suffers from substance use disorder, especially opioids. I know maybe it opioids weren't your son's drug of choice, but they started off with marijuana. I mean, that's how it starts.

[00:03:41] April Babcock: Look, the marijuana dealer knows the coke dealer. The Coke dealer knows the dope dealer. So his buddies, he started hanging out smoking marijuana. I found out later it was a Coke dealer, my son was living a Coke dealer after he graduated school, he lived with a buddy of his for a year for free.

And I, and I was just like, why is this dude letting you live with him for free? it made no sense to me. Well, you know, I was it out, but I did figure it out. He was selling cocaine.

And I didn't even know a lot of this until after my son died. I got his phone, was looking at in his phone after he was dead of lines of cocaine when he was like 20 and 21. 

 I mean, his of choice was cocaine. But at the very end of his life he started smoking it. So that's crack. I know at the end of his life, even started snorting dope to come down from his cocaine high. And a lot of people that are addicted to Coke, they'll go out and get just a li, like a dime dope, $10 worth of heroin. Not they're gonna do it all, but you do one line of heroin, it'll bring you right down from your cocaine high, so you're not out spending all your 

money

Yeah, cocaine 

[00:04:59] Angela Kennecke: it's really typical now for people to do meth or cocaine or something like an upper, and then to do heroin or some other opioid to bring them down. It's very, very typical among drug users.

and you believe that the root of his addiction though, was based as so many are in shame in that high school experience where he lost what was important to him and was

probably deeply ashamed of it, right.

[00:05:25] April Babcock: I don't know if it was, was ashamed of it. He was pissed. His whole life he lived and breathed Soccer 

in 

his senior year. They took that from him.

Some

of these kids, the only good thing going in their life their sports, and then you're gonna it it from 'em.

 (MUSIC UP!) 

[00:05:43] Angela Kennecke: Whatever the reason Austin turned to drugs, April says it progressively got worse. At first, she didn't even realize he was using drugs, but as time went on, it became more and more apparent The last few months before his death, she couldn't ignore it.

 (MUSIC UP!) 

[00:06:02] April Babcock: His drug of choice was coke. And I know the last like six months of his life, he started smoking it. It's still cocaine, crack coke. It's all the same.

 The last two years of his life. He started dating a girl was a heavy heroin user, and I told him, if you stay with her long enough, you're going to do what doing.

No, I won't. No, I won't. No, I won't. And this is before he ever

tried crack, like I already knew.

He

was kind of like a drug hopper,

whatever

was around kind of, it's like, I know he had a problem popping Xanax for a while. He used to do whippets, he smoked pot, he snorted cocaine. And then, then last years of his life, I know he tried heroin with his girlfriend. Admitted it to me.

My son never threw anything ever. if there was a cap of dope, I would ru I did rummage his cuz he was living back with me.

I rummaged room all the time. Hey, living in my house? I'm gonna be nosy. I know you're doing drugs. had little brother living here, here right.

it was just a nightmare. But his drug choice was coke. At the very end, his drug of choice was crack and I believe he doing crack and then a diamond Dope. To come down from the crack, 

 (MUSIC UP!) 

[00:07:21] Angela Kennecke: While April knew her son was abusing drugs, she never would've predicted what happened next. In January, 2018, Austin died from cocaine and fentanyl. However, April believes that her son didn't know he was ingesting fentanyl. Just like so many others who have died in our nation's drug epidemic. 

 (MUSIC UP!) 

[00:07:44] April Babcock: I ended up getting a police report, like after the fact. and when I pulled it out to it, this was like a year and a half after my son died, it said CVS residue. There was a straw with cVS residue. And I'm like, okay. Was it heroin? That had no heroin and was all fentanyl like? So my son die from and heroin, but there was no heroin Or did my son actually die from fentanyl and coke? And I think a lot of us parents we're just really never know the truth. truth Cause like what if kid. I'm I'm not saying kids are dying smoking weed, but what if your kid was smoking weed and what if your kid also popped a Percocet or popped the Xanax or popped an Adderall and when they're fake, the only thing gonna in the toxicology report is the fentanyl. You won't Percocet, you won't see Xanax. None of that's gonna show up cuz fake pills are fake. That's exactly what they are. They're 100% fentanyl

and whatever binding powders. The cartels used to bind these pills or drug dealers here in their basements.

 (MUSIC UP!) 

[00:08:55] Angela Kennecke: Unfortunately, fake pills are all too common. The US is battling the deadliest drug epidemic in history. Fentanyl being a major culprit, as we've told you on our Emily's Hope News headlines. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention estimates that approximately 75,000 out of the nearly 110,000 overdose deaths in 2022 were potentially linked to fentanyl.

This harrowing statistic not only signifies countless lives lost, but also millions of people suffering the profound grief of losing someone they love.

 (MUSIC UP!) 

[00:09:38] Angela Kennecke: So I know how devastating it is to lose a child, and I know, you know, wanting to do something. That's the whole basis of our charity. Emily's Hope is wanting to try to prevent this from happening to other people, and it keeps happening. We know that it keeps happening, but you formed Lost Voices of Fentanyl.

Tell me how that came about and what your mission is.

[00:10:01] April Babcock: So, know, I didn't lose my son then go out gate form lost voice to fentanyl. Like I literally. Prayed, and screamed for months. 

You know, I went Israel on his one year angel anniversary be closer to God. , I Bible studies going to church, and worship. me 100% running to Jesus. Like I knew I could not handle my grief on my own. because honestly, even with God in life, I wanted to die like these poor parents, us parents that lose our kids, our kids. We and breathe for our children, and now they're just a plane full of kids every day. 300 plus kids a day are dying. This is not normal. But that's how I started. You know, I prayed and prayed and prayed and then. One day, you know, god started answering my prayers and I was hearing from 'em and I formed my group October 7th, 2020, lost voices of Fentanyl.

I had a rally in the Chinese embassy because China is the head of the snake. They're killing off Americans and they're doing a great job of it. Without us doing anything back in return, our government needs to sanction China. They're supplying the precursor chemicals to the cartels to kill us. This a weapon of mass destruction.

[00:11:29] Angela Kennecke: Yeah, no, you're right, you're right. China is supplying all of the raw ingredients to the Mexican cartels where the Mexican cartels are assembling it and putting it in every drug and getting it into our country. And one part of this that's not talked about very much, and I know many of these people are suffering from addiction themselves, but about 80% of the drugs that contain fentanyl are being. Dealt in the United States by Americans, by US citizens. So you've got this chain, right? It's starting in China. And certainly China is not a friend to the United States.

[00:12:05] April Babcock: Like, that's why I support induced homicide. Mm-hmm. know, know I want 'em all locked up. Like, I don't we're gonna lock our way up out of this crisis. But when they're trafficking, fentanyl, fentanyl people in the United States trafficking fentanyl. when one Sweet and low packet, one gram has the potential to kill up to 500 Americans they're mass murderers. don't deserve any grace whatsoever. They deserve deserve prison.

[00:12:36] Angela Kennecke: Well, and some people now are addicted to fentanyl, which is quite shocking to me. People are seeking out fentanyl and playing Russian roulette no matter what illicit drug you use. But when you're seeking out fentanyl, I mean,

[00:12:48] April Babcock: I understand it quite well actually, almost no one has gone out the gate seeking fentanyl. it always starts with deception. Heroin users were the first being preyed upon. They wanted heroin, but nope, they were getting hooked on fentanyl, unbeknownst to them. And once you're dependent on it, it's too late. So everyone who's taken them Percocets, taking the Xanax, taking the Adderall that are fake for the people that do not die. They're getting dependent on it. And when you're dependent on it, yeah, then you're going out seeking it, but it's still a poisoning. There is no safe dose of illicit fentanyl. Absolutely zero. And honestly, what's a safe dose of heroin? What's a a safe dose of cocaine? Crack. mdma? There is no safe dose of any illicit drug just because people can grow a tolerance. To an illicit drug still does not imply there's a safe dose to take. 

[00:13:54] Angela Kennecke: And you have so much passion, I can hear, you know, the fire in your voice. I know you're channeling that through your group. What do you hope to accomplish through lost voices of fentanyl? 

[00:14:04] April Babcock: The days of crying closed doors are over. 

That slogan came to me like that and that's one reason why I made my group public, because the world needs to see what's going on.

I was in all groups before I created mine, and they all were private. The only way to get in there is to have a dead child. And I'm like, how in the world is everybody else gonna see what's going on? If the only way you can get in a group is you have a dead kid?

No, we need the world to see what's going on. It's almost like. We have to tip the scales. It's our politicians. We're at their mercy. We the majority of Republicans and the majority of democrats both saying the same thing. And that's when I think real will come about. We gotta tip the scales in our favor, so you know what that means? Buckle up. A lot more people are gonna die before anything is truly done.

[00:14:58] Angela Kennecke: Unfortunately, you're probably correct and it's a sad statement, but What do you have to say to people that wanna blame the user? Blame my daughter. Blame your son and say, oh, well you shouldn't have made that choice. You should never have used those drugs in the first place. And I think it's horrible that some people don't care if. 107,000. 110,000, I think it was in 2022, die because they look down on people who use drugs.

[00:15:27] April Babcock: You know, people, for me, I don't know, maybe I've become a heart of steel, but I don't let people affect me. I keep doing my thing and my thing because I know I'm saving lives 

you know, I'm not fighting for son. He's dead. can't bring him back. I'm fighting for the people that are alive to continue to stay alive. because let's get real people try illicit substances you know, no one goes first time and says, I'm gonna be addicted one day. I'm gonna be homeless on the street shooting dope. 

No one's ever said that. Okay. We don't know. And there's all sorts of reasons, you know, high schoolers. Good Lord. It's almost like a rite of passage to do drugs. When I was in high school, we were drinking, we were doing all that stuff. But you know, there wasn't death sentence in the drug supply

[00:16:22] Angela Kennecke: You're absolutely correct. Times have changed since we were in high school, and I think drug and alcohol use was looked at as a rite of passage, right? And so that has to completely change now. And that's one of the things we're trying to do at Emily's Hope with our prevention curriculum is start in kindergarten.

We're starting in kindergarten. We're starting with elementary school 

[00:16:42] April Babcock: And when someone, cause I've heard it quite often. Well, why are these young kids popping these pills? Well, guess what? Big Pharma created a pill popping society. can go on Netflix. There's a show called xanax, and there's like 19 year old girl on there who's, ooh, she lives off her Xanax. I mean, how many people are prescribed Xanax the world? Hello? it's absolutely So why are kid popping pills? That's why kids are popping pills because guess what? A Xanax never killed anyone either, and a Percocet never killed anyone. They do now because they're fake.

And a these young kids, they just don't know.

shouldn't be any pharmaceutical commercials on tv. They should be directly. With the doctors doctors only. I mean, people call up their doctors now. Well, I saw this on TV commercial. I need that. I must need that. 

I mean, come They're, they're targeting people it's a nightmare. It's money and it's corruption.

 (MUSIC UP!) 

[00:17:43] Angela Kennecke: April is fighting back against that corruption and trying to get lawmakers attention by holding her third annual March on the Capitol in DC set to take place in September. During the rally, hundreds of families who've lost loved ones to Fentanyl will come together and demand action from the White House.

 (MUSIC UP!) 

[00:18:05] April Babcock: So the first year I did it, it was in front of the Chinese Embassy, and last year I was like, you I'm gonna do it different. I'm gonna go to the National Mall. So this is my third annual rally, but this the second time I've been on the National Mall. So, be on the National Mall from 10 in the morning until three.

There'll be speakers on the mic all day, and then at three o'clock get a police escort and they block the roads down for us everything while we march with our signs and our bullhorns. And chant all the way to the White House. Once we get to the White House, we'll be there like an hour and a half, hour and 45 minutes, and we rally in front of the White House. Why do we rally front White House? Because it's front of the White House, and we will get attention, and that's what we want. It's like we almost have to shame our government into doing the right thing, and that's putting Americans first, which they're not doing.

 (MUSIC UP!) 

[00:19:04] Angela Kennecke: The rally is scheduled for Saturday, September 23rd. If you'd like more information on how to get involved in the event, just check out the show notes of this podcast. And while you're looking at those, we'd appreciate it if you'd give this episode a positive review and share it with your friends and family.

It helps further our mission of raising awareness about our nation's deadly drug crisis. Reducing the stigma associated with substance use disorder and ultimately preventing future tragedies. Together we can make a difference and save lives.

 (MUSIC UP!) 

 (commercial break - www.morethankjustanumber.org) 

[00:19:45] Angela Kennecke: And tell me, what do you expect the turnout to be in September? What are you expecting? How big was it last year?

[00:19:52] April Babcock: I didn't do a headcount last year. You know, I'm learning as I go every year. It'll get a little better and I can change things. So I'm gonna have a signup table this year so I can actually get a headcount of how many came to my rally. Cause you you can ask one mom, they might say 600. You can ask another They might say a thousand people. I don't know. Maybe six, 700 people came last year. But I'm hoping a thousand people show up. I mean, more of us making noise in Washington, dC it's our capital. 

I really don't want to go in front of the White House.

I don't wanna do that.

My goal is to one day elicit fentanyl, be out of the drug supply labeled a weapon of mass destruction, the cartels at terrorist organization. These, gives our government a bunch of tools that they don't have. it's like we're just sitting ducks here waiting for our government to get it together. But you day hopefully it'll different and I can just beautiful memorial events on the National Mall. That would be my dream.

[00:20:57] Angela Kennecke: Well, and this should really be a bipartisan issue because most lawmakers have been affected by this issue, whether it's someone in their family or somebody they know has died. Almost everybody at this point with the number of people dying have been affected by this issue. So really it shouldn't be politics as usual.

It should be uniting against a common threat.

[00:21:19] April Babcock: You would think, but it's just not that way.

And you know, us parents don't make it a political The politicians, both of 'em, Republicans and the Democrats, they've made political, not us.

[00:21:31] Angela Kennecke: Right. . 

And I do think it's gonna take, I've said this over and over again on the podcast, that it's gonna take just a bunch of angry, I always say angry mothers, but I'll include fathers in this too. A bunch of angry parents to create change in the world when it comes to this issue. I mean, we are losing our kids at a record rate, and it's mostly young people and it just should not be tolerated. And they've come from all walks of life and all education, all backgrounds. It doesn't discriminate.

[00:22:01] April Babcock: Absolutely not. You know, you sound like me. I say that with my group. I didn't make my to make people feel good. I'm not a grief group. though we support each other in our grief, I'm pissed off. And honestly, I believe it's called righteous anger. cause nothing happening about this crisis is making God smile. he's crying. I mean, our babies are die and, and literally babies are dying from it. So yeah, babies are dying. Our children are dying. Like my son didn't have a chance to recover. 

Before fentanyl, you had umpteen chances of recovery. Now with fentanyl in the drug supply, you don't get them chances no more. 

[00:22:45] Angela Kennecke: Well, and you're right about babies. You're right about babies. Because we have a headline service on Emily's Hope, where we keep track of the latest news involving overdose, fentanyl, addiction, all these things. And I keep seeing headlines young children, babies, and toddlers who are getting ahold of fentanyl and dying.

So it's not just teenagers or people in their early twenties, it's also babies.

[00:23:07] April Babcock: I say it's not limited to the substance use disorder community. is first time experimental, occasional users, people with an s u d and babies, that's who's dying. So they got to do something different. They can't treat it like they were treating the crisis 10 years  ago because it's not the same. You got instant death in the drug supply. They have to do something different. Or we're gonna get bodies on bodies. On bodies. bodies. It's, it makes me. wanna cry.

[00:23:39] Angela Kennecke: right. Yeah. It's just, it is devastating. I agree. And you talk about righteous anger and I feel you. But also grief. Grief it's at the bottom of, all, it underlies everything that I do, and I'm sure it underlies what you are doing too.

[00:23:55] April Babcock: I mean, I say I'm never gonna stop grieving. I don't think you can. How in the world can you ever stop grieving a child? I think it's impossible. It just fuels my fight because I don't want anybody else to feel the way I It's horrible.

Yeah. I remember the beginning, yeah. That's a deep, dark. Whole of a place

[00:24:20] Angela Kennecke: Right. And and some people can't crawl out of there. some people do get stuck in that. And I know exactly what you're talking about, 

[00:24:27] April Babcock: I think in 2021, eight moms that were mingling between my and like other groups on facebook. We lost eight moms that year to suicide, 

[00:24:37] Angela Kennecke: Right. 

 I call it collateral damage. It's the collateral damage of one death and it just spreads out. And, you know, that's a obvious, way that people are affected. But there's lots of other insidious ways that people are affected and their lives are changed too. After losing someone to poisoning like this.

[00:24:55] April Babcock: were turned upside down like that. And some you're right, don't get out it. That's why for me, I mean, whatever your higher power is, for me, it's God. That's my higher power and, and he's free. 

 (MUSIC UP!) 

[00:25:10] Angela Kennecke: In addition to her faith, new friendships have also helped April in her grief journey, particularly new relationships with parents who have also lost a loved one to fentanyl.

 (MUSIC UP!) 

[00:25:25] April Babcock: when my son died, my whole life Everything about my life changed and. lost a lot friends, but I've gained a tribe and they all understand my pain. Like you understand my pain. It's our new world. I never say my new normal. That term drives me crazy because

[00:25:47] Angela Kennecke: Yeah, I, I don't like that either. So Thanks,

[00:25:49] April Babcock: about this, but my new world is connecting with other people that understand and you know, gosh. When I meet these new parents when they're early bereaved, that's the hardest for me because then I got back to when was newly bereaved and that was hell. 

[00:26:11] Angela Kennecke: Well, I would agree with you. That affects me the most too, that you can just feel the pain, the rawness of the injury. I call it an injury, like a brain injury when you, you know, you have this sudden death and it's your child and that is tough. I'm glad you're out there raising your voice and speaking out, and I look forward to joining you in Washington, DC in September as well. I'll be there, I'll be podcasting and be there participating. So I look forward to connecting with all the other parents who were in Washington, DC for the rally as 

[00:26:41] April Babcock: That's awesome. I'm glad you're coming. I mean, the one thing if I could say to like the grieving families listening not just grieving families. Anybody write your politicians and tell 'em how you feel. like tell 'em that fentanyl is different. Like this is a weapon of mass Something different has got to be done. What they're currently doing isn't working and how do we know we got dead kids as proof, they continue to rise. 

So whatever's going on isn't working. So pressure, pressure, pressure. Politicians write a letter, send an email. All I can is for those that are alive. You know, people can call me a mob in front of White House, or a fear Mongerer all they They are not going to stop me because I know what me and all these other moms do, what we're doing, we are saving lives. We most definitely are.

[00:27:41] Angela Kennecke: Well, I love your determination.

Yeah. Well, thank you so much, Amy. I appreciate you joining me and look forward to meeting you in person in September.

 (MUSIC UP) Emily's Hope will be at the Fentanyl march in September on the Capitol. Again, we put more information in the show notes of this podcast. Make sure to stay tuned for additional coverage of the event by following our podcasts grieving out loud and visiting my Facebook and Instagram pages. We'll bring you updates, interviews, and stories surrounding the march.

Thanks for listening. We hope you found this podcast helpful. Until next time. Wishing you faith, hope, and courage. This podcast is produced by Casey Wonnenberg-King and Anna Fey

 (MUSIC UP!) 

[00:28:24] Angela Kennecke: